Recently Time magazine had an article about Mother Teresa (I couldn't find the link - Scott). The article commented on numerous letters that Mother Teresa wrote in which she says she does not feel the presence of God. Of course, this makes for much anti-God sentiment. Despite the fact that I immensely dislike Time magazine, the article was not too one-sided. However, I found the most relevant and truthful information on the last page. It was on the last page that I read about how all Christians have experienced doubt and as a result, questioned God's presence. It's during those times that we see how to respond to God. As Mother Teresa wrote, "If this brings you glory - if souls are brought to you - with joy I accept all to the end of my life."
Oddly, Mother Teresa's situation is not unlike how many Christians in prions feel every day. while my time served will be 28-29 months, I do know how feels to be in the dark. Our pastor here, Mike Savage, spoke on spiritual winters (which I wrote about before). Mike was in prison for 16 years. I know he went years without feeling God's presence. However, like Mother Teresa, he continued to minister to the lost men he encountered daily. He lived with them, ate with them, socialized with them, and in some cases, helped them come to know Jesus Christ as their Savior and Lord.
Prison, of course, is not like the streets of India. WE have food and a place to sleep. In some prisons you may encounter violence, but not in a camp. Nonetheless, it is a place where many men come without hope. For those of us who know the Lord, we are asked to share that hope, to accept all with joy if souls are added to the kingdom. I pray every morning the simplest of prayers: Jesus, I'm here to serve you. I don't always feel Jesus next to me, or close to me. I get angry and the injustice of this place and I grieve deeply over not being with my family. However, I continue to trust and to serve because this is where God has me.
There is one aspect of Mother Teresa's life that this article largely overlooks. It ignores the impact that Mother Teresa had on other people's lives. There is one part in the article where a reporter goes to India to do a story on Mother Teresa. He later accepts Christ. I think he experienced God's love through Mother Teresa. I'm sure that there are many people who have experienced God's love, mercy, kindness, and grace through Mother Teresa.
I know that here at Taft there are a number of men who have felt and experienced God's love because of a Christian who was simply obeying God. I hope that when I leave, regardless of how dark the time may have been for me, that Jesus says, "well done my faithful servant."