I heard a sermon here on spiritual seasons. The pastor focused on winter, even though it is the middle of summer. Anyway, he was saying how we as Christians will go through spiritual winters. These are times when we will not feel like very good Christians. We won't be sharing the gospel. We might not even feel like the gospel has any personal meaning. Church won't have much appeal and you probably won't be reading your Bible during a spiritual winter. I agreed with him in the sense that many Christians do go through those times. I'm not sure if this concept is biblical or not. I haven't done any research on it. I was also unsure if God caused the "spiritual winters" or if it was through our own rebellion and sin that we felt these "seasons." I think the reality is many of us have gone through a difficult spiritual time. I should distinguish between a spiritual a "spiritual winter" and a period of apathy. A "spiritual winter" is a time when you faith is challenged. External and internal factors make you re-evaluate what you believe about God and who God is. Spiritual apathy usually occurs when you are not being challenged although some of the effects of spiritual apathy do look like the spiritual winter. My belief is that God causes or allows spiritual winters. It is a time for growth and eventually renewal (Spring!). Spiritual apathy is caused by sin. How can you tell the difference? According to our pastor, the one thing that exists during a spiritual winter is a desire to know God. You may cry out to Him in pain, hurt, or anger. You may question Him. You may doubt your understanding of Him, but you are still engaging Him, the great I am. During your spiritual winter God will reveal to you things about Himself. You will come out of it renewed. If you are spiritually apathetic, you won't be talking to God or engaging Him at all. That's the big difference.
I've been spiritually apathetic and I believe I went through a spiritual winter. During my spiritual winter I didn't want to go to church. I didn't take communion. I didn't want to pray with my wife. I just wanted to have God show me who He is and show me He was there for me. During my time of spiritual apathy, I still don't want to go to church, but the big difference is I pretended to be a good Christian. I still went to Bible studies and all that. That's the thing, it's easy to pretend. I did not learn anything about who God is and I didn't really care to have Him reveal anything to me. I think God will surprise us. Sometimes the surprise does not manifest itself in a positive way in our life plan. The realization that God wanted me in prison was extremely difficult to accept. But, the revelation of who God is during that time has changed my life. If you feel that you are in a spiritual winter, continue to talk with the great I Am. It will end and you will be renewed. If you are stuck in apathy, well, the trickiest part is recognizing that you are even there.
Jeff
Thursday, July 26, 2007
Friday, July 20, 2007
The Body of Christ (#13)
When I first knew that I would likely be spending time in prison, one of my first fears (there were many) was would the church, the body of Christ, be willing to help me and my family. I'm not talking about a specific church per se, but God's people, those who call themselves believers. I have been skeptical of the church, that is, God's people, and the churches they attend because most of the churches I have attended failed to meet the needs of the very people in the church. I even doubted God. I said, "who is going to be their Dad?"
After three months, I have seen the body of Christ act. It has humbled me, but also has made me proud to be a part of the body of Christ. While it's true that nobody can replace me as the physical "dad," there have been plenty of people who have played with them. In other words, the things I would do with my kids are being done. Most importantly, the spiritual model is there. I know my kids will grow up with a stronger sense for what the body of Christ can accomplish.
I have also witnessed the body of Christ a bigger than a church, or a group of friends in that church. My concept of the body of Christ was usually limited to whatever clique I was attached to at church. I never expected a pastor or elder to do anything or know anything about my struggles. However, I was wrong. From my church in Roseville to my current church in Carmel, I have seen people I don't even know take action to support me, to support others in the body of Christ. People at church I have never heard of were praying for our marriage and for God to work in my life: all of this is happening. Our marriage has survived some difficult times. There are still difficult times ahead, but I know my wife and I have discovered true unconditional love for each other.
I've also seen the body of Christ meet basic, physical needs. I'm so thankful for the financial support we have received as well as the visits to help my wife with the boys. I've had people I've never met provide money for me. How great is God when something like that happens!
The lesson I have learned is a simple one. I can trust that even though we are sinful, we, as the body of Christ, can still be used by God in tangible ways to help others. It's a testimony that has powerful effects. I'm putting into practice what I've experienced through many of you. I'm learning to display God's love through the body of Christ by helping others.
Jeff
After three months, I have seen the body of Christ act. It has humbled me, but also has made me proud to be a part of the body of Christ. While it's true that nobody can replace me as the physical "dad," there have been plenty of people who have played with them. In other words, the things I would do with my kids are being done. Most importantly, the spiritual model is there. I know my kids will grow up with a stronger sense for what the body of Christ can accomplish.
I have also witnessed the body of Christ a bigger than a church, or a group of friends in that church. My concept of the body of Christ was usually limited to whatever clique I was attached to at church. I never expected a pastor or elder to do anything or know anything about my struggles. However, I was wrong. From my church in Roseville to my current church in Carmel, I have seen people I don't even know take action to support me, to support others in the body of Christ. People at church I have never heard of were praying for our marriage and for God to work in my life: all of this is happening. Our marriage has survived some difficult times. There are still difficult times ahead, but I know my wife and I have discovered true unconditional love for each other.
I've also seen the body of Christ meet basic, physical needs. I'm so thankful for the financial support we have received as well as the visits to help my wife with the boys. I've had people I've never met provide money for me. How great is God when something like that happens!
The lesson I have learned is a simple one. I can trust that even though we are sinful, we, as the body of Christ, can still be used by God in tangible ways to help others. It's a testimony that has powerful effects. I'm putting into practice what I've experienced through many of you. I'm learning to display God's love through the body of Christ by helping others.
Jeff
Saturday, July 14, 2007
3 Month Update (#12)
I've been here three months now. I have passed Memorial Day, Father's Day, the Fourth of July (my wife's birthday as well is on the fourth), and my birthday (July ninth). I have seen my wife 5 times and my kids 3 times since I entered. I actually consider myself lucky. Some people go months without seeing their families and some guys cannot afford to call their wives. There are many things for which I am thankful. I have a different job now. Instead of picking up trash and watering trees, I now hand out recreation equipment. I like this job because it gives me time to write and read.
I have also joined a soccer league. I've been hurt for 3 weeks, but what fun it is for me to play soccer. I have met a lot of people through soccer and have become more known around camp. the Hispanics call me Beckham. Beckham is a famous English soccer player who recently signed a $250 million contract to play soccer in the US (he just arrived in the US and should play for the LA Galaxy on July 21st - if anyone cared - VCmoney edit). The call me Beckham because I'm the only white player that is decent and Beckham is the only white player they know. I'm thankful for the chance to play, but also to be accepted. It makes a big difference.
I haven't taken on any new roles in the church here. You have to wait 4 months before you are even considered. At this point, I'm content with meeting the new people and trying to make them feel welcomed. I have been praying with a guy here named Tim. That has been a real blessing and answer to prayer for me. I'm thankful for the encouragement he provides and his faithfulness in praying. I also attend 2 Bible studies, a worship service, and a prayer group. I really enjoy the prayer group. They have helped me through some of the more difficult times int he past 3 months.
I should start taking some classes later this month. I cannot say how grateful I am to those of you who have contributed financially to enable me to take classes. It has been a faith step for me to trust God with my whole life. Thank you for showing me how God uses his people to show his faithfulness. Some of the classes I will be taking are in marketing and advertising through Ohio University that are part of a degree program. I will also take some courses the prison offers that enable me to get different jobs here. One is gardening and anther is quilting. The courses the prison offers are free, but as you can see, they aren't really for job preparation, but to pass the time and for various jobs around the prison.
I also have to say I'm thankful for the fun mail I'm getting. For my birthday, I got the USA today. Thanks to my brother and Todd Nauck (an awesome comic book artist and friend) - (look him up at www.wildguard.com - VCmoney edit) I'm getting comic books sent every month. Several of you also keep me informed about the latest games and toys as well as life (Thanks Tim, John B, and Trace). I've tried to write everyone on my address list. I've still got a few more to go through, and I apologize to those that I have not written yet.
Several of you have asked what I need. I try to direct those to Scott (my brother) or my sister (Jill). But, if you want to send me something, here is what is acceptable: any book purchased through Amazon.com, Borders.com, Barnesandnoble.com (hardbound or paperback). Paperback books can be send directly to me (use media mail, it's the cheapest). Magazines must come through a subscription. You cannot send a stamped self-addressed envelope (I have no idea why). If you want to send me money to help with postage, the best way is to send a US Postal money order (any money order will do, but a postal order gets to me the fastest) made payable to Jeffrey Wells. Put your address as the return address. Then, mail it to me as if it were a letter (through the post office). I'm always looking for people to help Laura and the boys with gift cards to Target or Trader Joes. Laura really appreciates that. I just want to say thank you all and that God is blessing me here through you.
Jeff
I have also joined a soccer league. I've been hurt for 3 weeks, but what fun it is for me to play soccer. I have met a lot of people through soccer and have become more known around camp. the Hispanics call me Beckham. Beckham is a famous English soccer player who recently signed a $250 million contract to play soccer in the US (he just arrived in the US and should play for the LA Galaxy on July 21st - if anyone cared - VCmoney edit). The call me Beckham because I'm the only white player that is decent and Beckham is the only white player they know. I'm thankful for the chance to play, but also to be accepted. It makes a big difference.
I haven't taken on any new roles in the church here. You have to wait 4 months before you are even considered. At this point, I'm content with meeting the new people and trying to make them feel welcomed. I have been praying with a guy here named Tim. That has been a real blessing and answer to prayer for me. I'm thankful for the encouragement he provides and his faithfulness in praying. I also attend 2 Bible studies, a worship service, and a prayer group. I really enjoy the prayer group. They have helped me through some of the more difficult times int he past 3 months.
I should start taking some classes later this month. I cannot say how grateful I am to those of you who have contributed financially to enable me to take classes. It has been a faith step for me to trust God with my whole life. Thank you for showing me how God uses his people to show his faithfulness. Some of the classes I will be taking are in marketing and advertising through Ohio University that are part of a degree program. I will also take some courses the prison offers that enable me to get different jobs here. One is gardening and anther is quilting. The courses the prison offers are free, but as you can see, they aren't really for job preparation, but to pass the time and for various jobs around the prison.
I also have to say I'm thankful for the fun mail I'm getting. For my birthday, I got the USA today. Thanks to my brother and Todd Nauck (an awesome comic book artist and friend) - (look him up at www.wildguard.com - VCmoney edit) I'm getting comic books sent every month. Several of you also keep me informed about the latest games and toys as well as life (Thanks Tim, John B, and Trace). I've tried to write everyone on my address list. I've still got a few more to go through, and I apologize to those that I have not written yet.
Several of you have asked what I need. I try to direct those to Scott (my brother) or my sister (Jill). But, if you want to send me something, here is what is acceptable: any book purchased through Amazon.com, Borders.com, Barnesandnoble.com (hardbound or paperback). Paperback books can be send directly to me (use media mail, it's the cheapest). Magazines must come through a subscription. You cannot send a stamped self-addressed envelope (I have no idea why). If you want to send me money to help with postage, the best way is to send a US Postal money order (any money order will do, but a postal order gets to me the fastest) made payable to Jeffrey Wells. Put your address as the return address. Then, mail it to me as if it were a letter (through the post office). I'm always looking for people to help Laura and the boys with gift cards to Target or Trader Joes. Laura really appreciates that. I just want to say thank you all and that God is blessing me here through you.
Jeff
Thursday, July 12, 2007
My visit to see Jeff (#11)
Over the 4th of July (long) weekend, my wife Beth and I flew to CA with our two children so that we could visit Jeff. We rented a car and piled into it with Jeff's wife and Jeff's two children. Starting from Carmel at 7:30 am it was about 55 degrees and foggy. By the time we got to Taft, it was about 111 degrees. It was quite an adjustment. After checking into a hotel, Laura (Jeff's wife), Jeff's two kids, and I drove over to the camp. It is about 4 miles or so from the hotel to the camp. As I mentioned in an earlier blog, a person could just walk away from the camp. It would be pretty easy to do so, but that would subject the escapee to a much higher degree of prison security, and a longer sentence. It's not worth it, but people do it.
I have never been to Taft before, so seeing the oil pumps reminded me of Bakersfield, except Taft is much smaller, and the terrain looks like scorched earth. Just barren. The drive up to the prison wasn't too bad for me, since I knew what to expect. There is a low security prison in front of Jeff's camp that holds non-citizen prisoners. Although it is low security, there are a lot of wires and protection because the inmates there are considered a high flight risk. To visit, we drove around this prison to the camp. You basically park outside of a building, and there are camp prisoners wandering about (they are taking care of the garden outside of the building). This is a hard job to get since there is a great degree of freedom. New inmates don't get this job. Off to the right there is a huge garden, it's as big as the recreation area, which I couldn't see all of, since it was behind the buildings, but Jeff told me that the garden was very large. I could see the garden, and it was at least as big as a football field, perhaps larger. In the middle, Jeff says, is a little pond, and there are paths through this garden. It has a lot of shade compared to the rest of camp, has fresh vegetables (which the prisoners are not supposed to take back to their bunks), and is very peaceful place compared to the rest of the camp. Jeff says that working in this garden is the best job, and the hardest to get. Anyway, that is what you see to the right of the building as you enter the prison facility. To the left there is a loading bay for the goods that the prisoners can buy, mail, food, etc.
As you walk into the building, the first thing I noticed again were the prisoners wandering about or waiting for something. I'm not quite sure. It was air conditioned (the second thing I noticed) and perhaps that explained the number of prisoners there. It is quite likely that they were all assigned to the lawn and plants just out front of the building, but were inside to escape the 111 degree sun. Since I am related to Jeff, I was cleared for a visit, but I didn't read my visitation rules very well and Laura told me that I could not wear shorts or my Adidas sandals. So, I borrowed some of Jeff's jeans and shoes before I went down. At any rate, I mention the clothes because the prisoners also have a strict dress code, they have to wear pants, and most wear some tan pants. They can wear tan or white t-shirts, but on a day like Friday (July 6th) they were almost entirely in white t-shirts. I later learned that I may have been mistaken for a prisoner in my khaki and white t-shirt that I wore while driving, and I understand why.
The room was very crowded this Friday. First, it was the 4th of July weekend, and second, we got there a little late for visitation. Visitation ends at 3, and we arrived at 12:30. We were still ushered right in to see Jeff, but he expected us about 12. We sat down at a table, and just began talking. Jeff looked the same to me, except much thinner than I had last seen him. One thing that struck me immediately was that the guards pay very little attention to what the inmates are doing, but in a minimum security camp, the prisoners know that being stupid and trying to bring in real contraband (drugs, alcohol, etc) would be a big mistake and not worth the risk. I wasn't even searched. Jeff is searched after every visit and must go through a drug scan as well.
The next thing I noticed was that every table was full of food that you would find at 7-11, stuff like candy bars, mini-bags of chips, and bagged sandwiches, hot dogs, etc. I couldn't figure out why the prisoners got so excited about this stuff, but Jeff told me that you get pretty sick of the food that they offer every day and so this 7-11 food is a nice treat. It also explained why you always bring some cash because they charge outrageous prices for this stuff. Jeff was craving a hamburger, and so we got him that (two of them - you can't buy only one) for $6. I ate one, and it wasn't bad. Jeff can get soda at this time pretty easily as well, even though they sell soda at the commissary. He still likes the freedom of being able to buy one whenever he wants without waiting for his turn to go to the commissary.
We spent about 2 hours and 15 minutes there on Friday. Jeff seemed in good spirits. We went back again on Sat at 8:30 and stayed until about 11:30. The hardest part about the visits with kids is that there is really nothing for them to do. There is a little room that the kids can go in and play and watch TV, but the prisoners can't go in there, so if you are bringing kids to see their dad, there is little point to send the kids away. At any rate, the prison visiting area does have crayons, books, and some puzzles, building blocks (well Jenga) and stuff to do at the tables.
I was very proud of my brother. Not only has he lost about 20 pounds in 3 months, but he is well thought of by many of the prisoners and seems to be well liked. It would be very easy for prisoners to ignore each other when they are spending precious time with their families, but a few prisoners made their way over to meet Jeff's twin (Jeff and I are identical), and to meet his wife and kids, if they hadn't already done so. Jeff knows people from playing soccer, from church, and from his dorm in general. He has gained some fame for being a decent Caucasian soccer player, but on this day, most of the guys were surprised what might have been Jeff's doppelganger. But, when they learned that we were identical twins, it just added more things for Jeff to talk to the guys about. I can't remember if Jeff has mentioned this, but prison is a place where being open, making friends, and talking about your personal life is not typical behavior. So, for the men to want to engage Jeff about his twin is a great starting point for him to engage these men.
Well, I'm not going to get to Jeff's blog, and I'm already behind one blog, so I'll get to one of them this weekend. I just wanted to share another story that Jeff talked about. As Jeff has mentioned previously, many of the guys look for creative ways to change the food options the prison gives them. Since they have access to microwaves, they try all kinds of things. Jeff says one guy in his dorm makes great tacos. It is quite an honor to have tacos with this guy, as Jeff says, because they are so good. Jeff says that if you have this honor, it is called, being in the car. So, the guy will go and say, hey what can you bring to ride in my car. Jeff will say, I can get some meat, or whatever they get. Jeff will ask, "who else is riding in your car?" which means either means who else is going to be eating tacos or what kind of tacos are we having, and could mean both. I'm not sure why I'm telling this story, but it really made Jeff smile that he was frequently offered to ride in this car and enjoy some tacos. A little variety for these men can make all the difference, and I just liked seeing my brother considered for a ride in the car.
This weekend, more from Jeff.
I have never been to Taft before, so seeing the oil pumps reminded me of Bakersfield, except Taft is much smaller, and the terrain looks like scorched earth. Just barren. The drive up to the prison wasn't too bad for me, since I knew what to expect. There is a low security prison in front of Jeff's camp that holds non-citizen prisoners. Although it is low security, there are a lot of wires and protection because the inmates there are considered a high flight risk. To visit, we drove around this prison to the camp. You basically park outside of a building, and there are camp prisoners wandering about (they are taking care of the garden outside of the building). This is a hard job to get since there is a great degree of freedom. New inmates don't get this job. Off to the right there is a huge garden, it's as big as the recreation area, which I couldn't see all of, since it was behind the buildings, but Jeff told me that the garden was very large. I could see the garden, and it was at least as big as a football field, perhaps larger. In the middle, Jeff says, is a little pond, and there are paths through this garden. It has a lot of shade compared to the rest of camp, has fresh vegetables (which the prisoners are not supposed to take back to their bunks), and is very peaceful place compared to the rest of the camp. Jeff says that working in this garden is the best job, and the hardest to get. Anyway, that is what you see to the right of the building as you enter the prison facility. To the left there is a loading bay for the goods that the prisoners can buy, mail, food, etc.
As you walk into the building, the first thing I noticed again were the prisoners wandering about or waiting for something. I'm not quite sure. It was air conditioned (the second thing I noticed) and perhaps that explained the number of prisoners there. It is quite likely that they were all assigned to the lawn and plants just out front of the building, but were inside to escape the 111 degree sun. Since I am related to Jeff, I was cleared for a visit, but I didn't read my visitation rules very well and Laura told me that I could not wear shorts or my Adidas sandals. So, I borrowed some of Jeff's jeans and shoes before I went down. At any rate, I mention the clothes because the prisoners also have a strict dress code, they have to wear pants, and most wear some tan pants. They can wear tan or white t-shirts, but on a day like Friday (July 6th) they were almost entirely in white t-shirts. I later learned that I may have been mistaken for a prisoner in my khaki and white t-shirt that I wore while driving, and I understand why.
The room was very crowded this Friday. First, it was the 4th of July weekend, and second, we got there a little late for visitation. Visitation ends at 3, and we arrived at 12:30. We were still ushered right in to see Jeff, but he expected us about 12. We sat down at a table, and just began talking. Jeff looked the same to me, except much thinner than I had last seen him. One thing that struck me immediately was that the guards pay very little attention to what the inmates are doing, but in a minimum security camp, the prisoners know that being stupid and trying to bring in real contraband (drugs, alcohol, etc) would be a big mistake and not worth the risk. I wasn't even searched. Jeff is searched after every visit and must go through a drug scan as well.
The next thing I noticed was that every table was full of food that you would find at 7-11, stuff like candy bars, mini-bags of chips, and bagged sandwiches, hot dogs, etc. I couldn't figure out why the prisoners got so excited about this stuff, but Jeff told me that you get pretty sick of the food that they offer every day and so this 7-11 food is a nice treat. It also explained why you always bring some cash because they charge outrageous prices for this stuff. Jeff was craving a hamburger, and so we got him that (two of them - you can't buy only one) for $6. I ate one, and it wasn't bad. Jeff can get soda at this time pretty easily as well, even though they sell soda at the commissary. He still likes the freedom of being able to buy one whenever he wants without waiting for his turn to go to the commissary.
We spent about 2 hours and 15 minutes there on Friday. Jeff seemed in good spirits. We went back again on Sat at 8:30 and stayed until about 11:30. The hardest part about the visits with kids is that there is really nothing for them to do. There is a little room that the kids can go in and play and watch TV, but the prisoners can't go in there, so if you are bringing kids to see their dad, there is little point to send the kids away. At any rate, the prison visiting area does have crayons, books, and some puzzles, building blocks (well Jenga) and stuff to do at the tables.
I was very proud of my brother. Not only has he lost about 20 pounds in 3 months, but he is well thought of by many of the prisoners and seems to be well liked. It would be very easy for prisoners to ignore each other when they are spending precious time with their families, but a few prisoners made their way over to meet Jeff's twin (Jeff and I are identical), and to meet his wife and kids, if they hadn't already done so. Jeff knows people from playing soccer, from church, and from his dorm in general. He has gained some fame for being a decent Caucasian soccer player, but on this day, most of the guys were surprised what might have been Jeff's doppelganger. But, when they learned that we were identical twins, it just added more things for Jeff to talk to the guys about. I can't remember if Jeff has mentioned this, but prison is a place where being open, making friends, and talking about your personal life is not typical behavior. So, for the men to want to engage Jeff about his twin is a great starting point for him to engage these men.
Well, I'm not going to get to Jeff's blog, and I'm already behind one blog, so I'll get to one of them this weekend. I just wanted to share another story that Jeff talked about. As Jeff has mentioned previously, many of the guys look for creative ways to change the food options the prison gives them. Since they have access to microwaves, they try all kinds of things. Jeff says one guy in his dorm makes great tacos. It is quite an honor to have tacos with this guy, as Jeff says, because they are so good. Jeff says that if you have this honor, it is called, being in the car. So, the guy will go and say, hey what can you bring to ride in my car. Jeff will say, I can get some meat, or whatever they get. Jeff will ask, "who else is riding in your car?" which means either means who else is going to be eating tacos or what kind of tacos are we having, and could mean both. I'm not sure why I'm telling this story, but it really made Jeff smile that he was frequently offered to ride in this car and enjoy some tacos. A little variety for these men can make all the difference, and I just liked seeing my brother considered for a ride in the car.
This weekend, more from Jeff.
Wednesday, July 4, 2007
Two Interesting Fellows (#10)
I'm going to visit my brother this weekend. I hope to share a bit about what I see and encounter. My wife and kids and I are taking Jeff's wife and kids down for a visit. Now onto the blog.
I want to share a story that opened my eyes. There is a young guy here who is a friend of one of my bunkies. This young guy is always borrowing things from me. He's self-centered, so he never offers anything in return. Unfortunately, I got to the point where I expected something from him. About two weeks ago, he went into my locker and borrowed my scissors without asking anyone. That's a huge faux pas here. The next day he left a coke on my locker. I knew his intent was not to give it to me in exchange for borrowing my scissors, but the next morning, I drank the coke. The guy came by later and wanted his coke. He was really upset. He told some of his friends, one of which started giving me a hard time about my job. Now, my boss has never complained about how I do my job, but this guy had a problem with me. One thing I knew, I was not handling the situation in a Christ-like manner. I shared with my prayer team that I felt that I was under some spiritual attack.
Later that weekend, after praying a lot about the situation, I saw the guy who was harassing me at my job. I had already returned the coke to the young guy and apologized for drinking it, so I had tried to allay that animosity. When I saw the guy who was harassing me, I felt that Spirit saying I should talk to him. So I did. You could tell the guy was expecting a confrontation, but I asked him how long he watered each tree. I told him I would water longer.
This past week I spend extra time watering and working the trees. I believe I've reconciled with both of these guys. Both have been much more cordial. I'm not their friends, but I hope that my behavior did reflect Christ. The informal rules of prison would have exonerated my behavior of drinking the coke, and the advice I got from my bunkies confirmed that. In fact, my bunkies told me that I should cuss the guy out and tell him to mind his own business, not sparing any expletives. I was also justified by legitimate prison rules in drinking the coke. However, there are times when you have to be humble and accept persecution and still do what Christ would do. Although, at times, it may be hard to do that.
Jeff
I want to share a story that opened my eyes. There is a young guy here who is a friend of one of my bunkies. This young guy is always borrowing things from me. He's self-centered, so he never offers anything in return. Unfortunately, I got to the point where I expected something from him. About two weeks ago, he went into my locker and borrowed my scissors without asking anyone. That's a huge faux pas here. The next day he left a coke on my locker. I knew his intent was not to give it to me in exchange for borrowing my scissors, but the next morning, I drank the coke. The guy came by later and wanted his coke. He was really upset. He told some of his friends, one of which started giving me a hard time about my job. Now, my boss has never complained about how I do my job, but this guy had a problem with me. One thing I knew, I was not handling the situation in a Christ-like manner. I shared with my prayer team that I felt that I was under some spiritual attack.
Later that weekend, after praying a lot about the situation, I saw the guy who was harassing me at my job. I had already returned the coke to the young guy and apologized for drinking it, so I had tried to allay that animosity. When I saw the guy who was harassing me, I felt that Spirit saying I should talk to him. So I did. You could tell the guy was expecting a confrontation, but I asked him how long he watered each tree. I told him I would water longer.
This past week I spend extra time watering and working the trees. I believe I've reconciled with both of these guys. Both have been much more cordial. I'm not their friends, but I hope that my behavior did reflect Christ. The informal rules of prison would have exonerated my behavior of drinking the coke, and the advice I got from my bunkies confirmed that. In fact, my bunkies told me that I should cuss the guy out and tell him to mind his own business, not sparing any expletives. I was also justified by legitimate prison rules in drinking the coke. However, there are times when you have to be humble and accept persecution and still do what Christ would do. Although, at times, it may be hard to do that.
Jeff
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)